WHISPERING

This morning, I'd just gotten through most of "The Man who Listens to Horses" for only the second time, so I decided to do a little whispering of my own, with my always-willing Ickis.

I led a friskier than usual beastie to the roundpen, removed halter, draped it over the fence, and took to the center.

I emulated the mountain lion, hands clawlike and high above my head, and stared him square in his steely eye. You see, this was to get him to move foreword, the Advance part of Advance and Retreat. He moved forward, indeed!- mimicking my very "rooowwwwrrrrr" action by rearing up and launching at me, the "Oh, I see- a GAME!" look in his eye. Well, that's where I incorporated the Retreat part. I retreated until the hoofbeats ceased. I then threw my leadrope at his hindquarters, which then made him circle fast enough to dizzy me. I allowed the "sash" to lay outstretched on the ground, and he decided to then longe me. He grabbed it in his teeth and chased me around the pen until he was somehow in front of me. I ducked into his shoulder pocket, and for the first time in his existence with me, executed a perfect reining horse spin to try to get to me. He stepped on the rope, it snapped his head a little, and that bought me time to headlock him; I gave him a noogie right on his star until he did that really fast helicopter thing with his ears, and we longed each other for awhile. I stopped to gasp for breath, and that's when his ears swiveled (outward in mischief), and his head dropped (aiming at my chest). He mouthed at me, like all whispered horses do, and even Monty would have been able to decipher: "You make me wear pink. You spray me with raspberry mist. You have oppressed my ancestors through me.. Got any cereal?".. and then it of course went blank...

He took his first step toward me. The moment was magic- because he took such a practiced aim with his big goofy head that when it collided with my thoracic cavity, I landed squarely on the ground, sprawled flat. And, just to show he trusted me in my position of power and authority, he attempted to drag my shoe off. Yes, this new method made me in total control in less than thirty minutes. He had accepted my presence in his territory, shown affection (by removing the sweat from my face with his tongue), and we'd established who was alpha.

One thing I wonder why Monty didn't include in his book: You're only taller than the tail of a Arabian when you're on your FEET, not on your back.

And, I learned a valuable lesson:

Don't try the stuff they do in books, movies, and cartoons.....a Bob Stewart Contribution